There are four main outcomes to virtually every decision: you get what you want and realize it’s what you wanted, you get what you want and realize it isn’t what you wanted, you don’t get what you want and realize it’s what you wanted or you don’t get what you want and realize it isn’t what you wanted. I don’t believe there are many rights and wrongs in life, just a series of paths which lead us to our ultimitate destinies. If we follow our gut instincts and cancel out all the opposing forces: fear, doubt, anxiety, judgement, self-image etc., we will be able to fulfill our lives with the greatest maximum potential.
I am back in New Jersey and I don’t want to list all of the tangible reasons why I wasn’t meant to be in Spain at this point in time. In the greater story of my life, I can’t even begin to understand what led me back here so suddenly and why. I may not know until years later once all my dots have been connected and I can finally make sense of it all. The truth is, I may never know the exact reason. What’s important, is that I trust in myself and the universe. I can’t look at this as a failure or ending, but instead as a beautiful new beginning with as infinite an amount of possibilities as anywhere else.
In the short time I lived in Spain I learned more about myself, what I want, and who I am than during any other duration of my life. I grew comfortable with being alone in a foreign place and pulled my sense of direction out from the dusty space it has always been hiding. I met new people. I talked about life and love and cultural differences. I danced at a fiesta alone and free, surrounded by crowds of people that didn’t speak a word of my language. I lived. I lived and I learned, and in turn I grew. This is not the end of my traveling or my writing. As long as I’m still curious about the wonderment that surrounds me, I’ll continue to explore, continue to ask questions, and continue to grow and learn with every passing moon.
Although, I will probably change the name of this blog, this will not be my last post. If you enjoy readng it, I invite you to continue to do so. Even though I am currently living in a place that is familiar to me, there are always different angles in which everything can be seen.
I appreciate all the love and support and am very open to discussing the trials that led me here. Just ask me over the phone or in person. Right now I have more unknowns than I’ve ever had; it is as exciting as it is debilitating. I look forward to the ambiguity of my future and to seeing where this crazy route will lead me next. Stay tuned people, it’s going to be a fascinating life.